Hello
The latest tune I've been working on.
Bit of a love song ballad any feedback welcome.
Lyrics also below.
Thanks
https://youtu.be/HWpsfB-akcU
Lyrics
I was born by the sea
I got an old soul in me
I find my own way
Through the scares of yesterday
Now I've much still to learn
But how many times must I get burned
To find my one true love
You come to me when I sleep
I saw your face in a vivid dream
Maybe someday we might still meet
You look a lot like her
You even sound like her too
But I've been living with these doubts
I gotta figure all this stuff out
And until that day should arise
I'll be wishing on a hopeful sign
To find my one true love
You come to me when I sleep
I saw your face in a vivid dream
Maybe someday we might still meet
I'm waiting here for you
I've been waiting all this time...
Wow, beautiful song and well delivered. Youve got a really good voice, and the guitar is really nice with good embellishments.
Lyrically, I must admit I am confused a little. It's probably just me but a can't work out who you are singing to. I thought I had it until the line "you look a lot like her". With the introduction of this seemingly important new character, I became very confused as to the message. Like I said, probably just me not understanding.
If I had an area to improve, the guitar, as great as it is, became a little monotonous in its delivery. I feel you just need to add some dynamics to the song. Maybe change the strum pattern for the chorus? Or, the second verse with softer more laid back pattern so that it builds back up with the second chorus? I just feel it would be good for the song and would help emphasise the chorus.
Really nice song and well delivered.
Thank you I appreciate your response glad you enjoyed.
Yes my writing confuses me sometimes your not the only one ;-))
Referring to the new partner looking and sounding like the previous but it doesn't really matter the Issues lies with you not them etc.
Definitely with you regarding changing it up for the 2nd verse with a build up.
Cheers for listening
Quote from: Seriousfun on Nov 25, 2025, 07:14 PMWow, beautiful song and well delivered. Youve got a really good voice, and the guitar is really nice with good embellishments.
Lyrically, I must admit I am confused a little. It's probably just me but a can't work out who you are singing to. I thought I had it until the line "you look a lot like her". With the introduction of this seemingly important new character, I became very confused as to the message. Like I said, probably just me not understanding.
If I had an area to improve, the guitar, as great as it is, became a little monotonous in its delivery. I feel you just need to add some dynamics to the song. Maybe change the strum pattern for the chorus? Or, the second verse with softer more laid back pattern so that it builds back up with the second chorus? I just feel it would be good for the song and would help emphasise the chorus.
Really nice song and well delivered.
Quote from: muso1070 on Nov 25, 2025, 04:36 PMHello
The latest tune I've been working on.
Bit of a love song ballad any feedback welcome.
Lyrics also below.
Thanks
Hey man I'm impressed , Great vocals , Good vid man
https://youtu.be/HWpsfB-akcU
Lyrics
I was born by the sea
I got an old soul in me
I find my own way
Through the scares of yesterday
Now I've much still to learn
But how many times must I get burned
To find my one true love
You come to me when I sleep
I saw your face in a vivid dream
Maybe someday we might still meet
You look a lot like her
You even sound like her too
But I've been living with these doubts
I gotta figure all this stuff out
And until that day should arise
I'll be wishing on a hopeful sign
To find my one true love
You come to me when I sleep
I saw your face in a vivid dream
Maybe someday we might still meet
I'm waiting here for you
I've been waiting all this time...
This is kind of different. A love song about a fantasy woman, if I'm listening correctly. Is the 4th line in the first verse "...scares of yesterday" or "scars of yesterday". It says "scares", but it sounds like you're saying "scars". Scars really works! The song is very interesting and kind of mesmerizing.
Vicki
It has been a very nice listening, wonderful lyrics and cool vibe here!!! Your live song sounds great on your YouTube video!!!
Thanks Elvis I loved your track too buddy.
Cheers
Hey man I'm impressed , Great vocals , Good vid man
https://youtu.be/HWpsfB-akcU
Lyrics
I was born by the sea
I got an old soul in me
I find my own way
Through the scares of yesterday
Now I've much still to learn
But how many times must I get burned
To find my one true love
You come to me when I sleep
I saw your face in a vivid dream
Maybe someday we might still meet
You look a lot like her
You even sound like her too
But I've been living with these doubts
I gotta figure all this stuff out
And until that day should arise
I'll be wishing on a hopeful sign
To find my one true love
You come to me when I sleep
I saw your face in a vivid dream
Maybe someday we might still meet
I'm waiting here for you
I've been waiting all this time...
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Hello Vicki your 100% right it is scars haha my spelling error.
Thanks for noticing as it was the same below the video.
Glad you enjoyed thank again.
Quote from: Vicki on Nov 29, 2025, 05:09 AMThis is kind of different. A love song about a fantasy woman, if I'm listening correctly. Is the 4th line in the first verse "...scares of yesterday" or "scars of yesterday". It says "scares", but it sounds like you're saying "scars". Scars really works! The song is very interesting and kind of mesmerizing.
Vicki
Hey thank you Mora nice to hear from you :-)
Quote from: Mora Amaro La Loba on Nov 29, 2025, 11:32 AMIt has been a very nice listening, wonderful lyrics and cool vibe here!!! Your live song sounds great on your YouTube video!!!
I love this track. Great to hear a guy who can strum a great guitar and deliver a really soulful vocal. Nice lyrics too. Nothing not to like about this. No crits from me at all...just nice to sit back and enjoy. Fabulous. :)
Thanks Chris that's very encouraging and super appreciated cheers buddy ;D
Quote from: ChrisPrice on Dec 06, 2025, 08:14 PMI love this track. Great to hear a guy who can strum a great guitar and deliver a really soulful vocal. Nice lyrics too. Nothing not to like about this. No crits from me at all...just nice to sit back and enjoy. Fabulous. :)
Excellent.