@muso1070 ,

Definitely a catchy melody. And superb vocals! 
I also watched another videos on your YouTube channel.
Very talented songwriting and performance!
Definitely, I like this kind of music.

Maya

@Sully62 ,

Beautiful nature in the photos.
The song conveys all the beauty of the Cornwall Sky.
Nice music, nice vocals.

Maya

@Chwill ,

At the beginning - a beautiful, fairy-tale-sounding melody.
Then the transition to hard rock is very unexpected.
The purity of the solo guitar sound in the second part needs some work.

Maya

@Vicki ,

"(1) the melody..."  I think you are being overly self-critical. Listening to your song, I didn't feel that the melody was "boring". An interesting melody flows airily throughout the song. There are no problems with either the melody or the ending of the song. Everything is very good.

"(2) production..." For my taste, the drums in the song are enough.  This is not a trendy song with over-compressed vocals and an abundance of strange, extraneous sounds. This is a soulful country song. Extra instruments will only distract. I like both the melody and the production.

The song is very soulful. I have listened to it several times already.

Maya

@neil connor ,
Good sounding rock with a late 70's vibe.
Cool guitars and good vocal performance.

Maya

This is a solid rock track released by Eric Clapton in 1989, titled Bad Love. Great guitar work from him as usual.

My songwriting method used to be to write the whole thing at once. I mean, lyrics and melody came together as I wrote. Lately I've been writing lyrics with no melodies and then laboring to come up with melodies. I don't know why my method has changed, and I'm finding it difficult to come up with melodies after the lyrics. Anyway, I have a new lyric.

My current lyric has two versions. I'm posting both of them here and I'm looking for recommendations for which one to keep. I have my own idea which one is best, but I don't really want to lose either one. Also, either or both of them might still be in development. Words can always change.

Any kind of feedback is welcome. I'm not looking for praise--I want actionable suggestions, if you have some.

So here are the two versions:

"Tired All the Time"-Version 1

VERSE 1
It's morning; I wish I was still asleep
But nature calls, and everything hurts
I crawl out of bed; to the bathroom I creep
And that is as much as I care to exert

CHORUS
I'm so tired all the time
I'm so tired all the time
Is there somewhere I can hide
I'm so tired all the time

VERSE 2
I expect judgment from some in my life
I feel so frantic; I just don't feel able
My chest is all knotted; I'm so not all right
My friends probably think I'm unstable

CHORUS

BRIDGE
I used to love to do things
I had an eagerness spark
Planning a plan gave me wings
But these days my fire is dark

CHORUS
===========================================
"Tired All the Time"-Version 2

VERSE 1
It's morning; I wish I was still asleep
I'm all worn out from my head to my feet
But nature calls, so out of bed I creep
And I'm hungry, so I'll get something to eat

CHORUS
I'm so tired all the time
I'm so tired all the time
Is there somewhere I can hide
I'm so tired all the time

VERSE 2
I want to get away from all the pressure in my life
It's run, run, run from morning till night
My stomach's in knots; my chest wound tight
It's hard to breathe; I'm feeling fight or flight

CHORUS

BRIDGE
I used to love to do things
I had an eagerness spark
Planning a plan gave me wings
But these days my fire is dark

CHORUS

Hi
a bit different than your other songs
but still very good , great groove & mix

subvibe