[namenowoneman]

Hi there,

Here is my second song:

http://soundcloud.com/namenowoneman/paper-negative

V1:
Straight from the lamplight blossom
There shoots a fiery fleet
Upon the silent glossing
Of a sunken paper sheet

Entrapped in a crystal tremble
The grain, blackening with sweat
Lets out in auroras of amber
A trace of a silhouette

C:
A one-man show
A lesson learned
A memory to relive
In monochrome
And overturned
A paper negative

V2:
He looks at a world in inverse
A master of sudden exposure
Who bring that in shadows immersed
To shine in convulsive explosions

And after the anti-eclipse
He plants his pictures to grow
Then shuts with his mad fingertips
In his portfolio

V3:
As I revealed to him
My idiosyncrasies
I felt my brightness dim
And I felt weak at the knees

I had my daydreams burn
I had my nightmares inflame
To spark in a dazzling re-turn
A mirror reflection
Of my blooming affection
Sunk in rejection and shame

[Schavuitje]

I really enojoyed this

Reminded me very much of Peter Gabriel and maybe even early Genesis.

I absolutely love your chord choices. Very inventive and very clever.

It's obviously an album track but that's cool, I love it.

I won't pretend to understand the lyrics, I think a good few more listenings would be needed to even begin to

understand what I think the song might be about. I don't really care though. It worked.

I get where you are going with the vocals and the melodies they weave, very nice But you need to deliver them better.

You have obviously thought very well about the melody of them but now you need to get every nuance, every syllable exactly right,

every note length and word delivered with as much care as the next for it to match the greatness of the music.

Very good  

[nooms]

just as amazing as the first song
beautifully done
takes wonderful turns, great words
vocals excellent and amazingly sound like rufus wainright in places, with the same
inventive twists and chords but on another planet..
piano sounds unworldy, like an apparition,
think id better stop dribbling..

really glad ive heard these songs, they are special
wonderful stuff
all the best to you
nooms

[Songsmith]

Hi,
    this is a really good song, love the piano, lots of latin touches leaning more towards Cuban I think, love your chord structuring & rhythm. This would sound tremendous with upright double bass on & a bit of percussion, no drums for me though. Smashin' job