[Scarriff]

Heyy guys, here's one I wrote recently, hopefully it gives off a bitter sweet positive sort of vibe, since that's kind of what I'm aiming for in most of my recent songs.

The style of the song is quite soft with a strong beat overlay, or at least that's how I heard it when I wrote it, hope y'all like...

SOMEHOW (everything will be alright)


(verse 1)
Somehow this home we build
with such painful stokes has come
crumbling down before my very eyes
My disguise starts to cry out in shame
My hearts distain from the hatred
that you bathe in, yeah you lay there

(chorus)
I make and break you somehow
I complicate you, oh well
This constant state of your hell
I've make mistakes
But who hasn't
Who is the expection
You're just second guessing yourself
Beyond death is more hell

(verse 2)
Somehow that empty shell of a girl
Once was my beautiful world
I destroyed with love and pollution
Our greenhouse effect of lustful deception
Implodes in agony taking a part of me
you we're in love with, Oh how you loved it

(chorus)
I make and break you somehow
I desecrate you, oh well
You rip your soul out to sell
I've taken names
But who hasn't
Who is the expection
Beyond how far we fell
is just more hell, just more hell

(bridge)
I don't claim to be the exeption
Only part of the infection
That you start to feel a affection for
The pain you can't ignore
Despite my many thorns
Inside are many more
What do you hate me for
You know you'd kill for more

(chorus)
I make and break you somehow
I penetrate you, oh well
Whatever name you now yell
with mine in mind
But who hasn't
I am your protection
You're just second guessing again
I was you're only friend

(wind down)
Don't you throw me aside, my love you won't survive
I look into your eyes, my girl it'll be alright
I wash your dirty hands and hold on tight again
Everything will be alright, my girl you'll be okay

Somehow...

[hardtwistmusic]

Wow, could I identify with THAT.  This is deep.  I get a sense that "she" had dumped "him" and he's disturbed.  Not because "he" won't be okay, but because he suspects "she" won't be okay.

I just lived that.  You captured it perfectly.

[Nellie]

Hiii! I absolutely agree with Verlon, couldn't have said it better myself. My favourites are:
''I make and break you somehow
I penetrate you, oh well
Whatever name you now yell
with mine in mind'' -- such great lines ahh!
The whole song is just amazing, well done!

[benjo]

 I like this lyric a lot its a very clever write
 well used words in the right places
 my mind was thinking on words what does that really mean
 maybe wrong I maybe right with many of the words
 but they all did speak out to me

 some lines I didn't connect with fully
 but this was a good read too

 and I loved the wind down part / very nice write
 well done on this one

[Thomas Frederick]

I think this is very good, I like it a lot actually. It has some really powerful words that paint the song very well.

I really like the powerful kind of story that has been developed underneath all of this, I think it makes the lyric even more special.

The one thing I do think needs a little bit more tweaking is the bridge; something about that seems a bit off to me, like it didn't really flow with the song very well. Though that just might be I'm not thinking of it in the same way you are.

Overall, very impresed!

[Scarriff]

Hardtwistmusic - I'm impressed by the fact that you actually just explain my song better than I did, thanks for the feedback I'm glad you it!! cheers Verlon

Nellie - Cheers buddy and from one "Busker" to another your last song was pretty awesome too.

Benjo - Thanks for the positive feedback, I like that you said the word "clever" since that's how I like to write not only emotionally but intelligently, plus it helps to inflate my sense of narcissism which is always good lol.

IPAintRainbows - I'm glad you liked the song, to clarify the bridge does flow rather well in my head, I guess I have to remember that people reading my songs don't read it how I do lol, when looking upon my lyrics as Devils advocate I do see what you mean, perhaps I need to step back from being a writer and become a reader also... so cheers for pointing that out

[Paulski]

I may be going against the flow here a bit but... I too thought the lyrics were clever and well thought out, but for me, I wanted a memorable take-away from the chorus that was more repetitive and dumbed down. It was like trying to drink from an intellectual  fire hose- I needed to take a brain breath. Now with musical pausing and arrangement you can get around that I'm sure. Sorry to be such a dumb lazy-brained reader!
Paul
.

[Gallowglass]

I literally just went through this exact situation. Got to admit I laughed at the 'with mine in mind' line - I said to my ex that she'd prefer it if she could be with me and she pulled one of those awkward 'yep' smiles.

I think this song captures the situation brilliantly, with just the right blend of I-told-you-so, genuine concern, and heartbreak. It's a heady, yet alleviating mix.

[PeeJay]

Hi Scarriff,

Your pic brings memories of Adam Ant to me! Don't know if you know of him.

Anyway....

I did get the bittersweet feel you intended from this and there are alot of good lines.

I just wondered whether one consistent chorus would be better to focus it. It was also a little over-complicated in parts and a 'less is more' approach would be more appealing IMHO. But i'm a simple soul!

Nice one,

Phil.